Out of Orbit

i’ve been sick. i woke up this morning and dropped byron at kindy. then i went to windsor for about 35mins. then i went home and fell asleep. i woke up again at 5.05pm. i had a leaders meeting tonight. i basically have nothing of interest to say because i have observed very little of life in the past 36 hours.

i got some fun emails from america. nice. sounds like they are having a good time. bummer about Sammy Sosa. silly silly. i saw on David Letterman last night, the Top Ten excuses for Sammy Sosa having a corked bat. i’m glad that jeremy had explained that he’d been caught out. otherwise i would’ve been lost. also funny on Letterman was the ” GW Bush Joke that’s not Funny” segment. cos really. it wasn’t.

here’s what’s cool at the moment. Flashback TV. every night from 5.00pm they play Cheers, then Mash, then the Wonder Years… hehe. fred savage was such a cutie.

that’s really about it. i haven’t spoken to anyone, seen anyone or sent any interesting emails. damn.

but i am alive. only just.

you know those weird dreams that you have when you are sick> like you’re so on the edge that everything seems very strange. especially those dreams that you half wake up from and then go straight back to when you go back to sleep? i had one of those today. it was a long dream. i was helping someone to plan a wedding i think.. but it was very strange. i had to try out all the food, and then the flowers got all complicated. and the rings kept changing. it was strange. that’s all i can say. i miss my friends. no calls to see how i am. no one has noticed the fact that they haven’t seen me all week. hmph.

Life Explained

On the first day God created the cow. God said, “You must go to field with

the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk

to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years.”

The cow said, “That’s a kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty

years. Let me have twenty years and I’ll give back the other forty.”

And God agreed.

On the second day, God created the dog. God said, “Sit all day by the door

of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you

a life span of twenty years.”

The dog said, “That’s too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I’ll

give back the other ten.”

So God agreed (sigh).

On the third day God created the monkey. God said, “Entertain people, do

monkey tricks, make them laugh. I’ll give you a twenty year life span.”

Monkey said, “How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don’t think so.

Dog gave you back ten, so that’s what I’ll do too, okay?”

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day God created man. God said, “Eat, sleep, play, have sex,

enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I’ll give you twenty years.”

Man said, “What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I’ll take my

twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten

monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?”

“Okay,” said God. “You’ve got a deal.”

So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex,

enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to

support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain

our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house

and bark at everybody.

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