Let’s Talk About Sex Baby
so here it is theology 101 and the question of the day… to the class for general discussion and hopefully, a theologically sound answer… “is sex before marriage OK?”. what an opportunity for a smartass like me to say…. “shouldn’t it be better than just OK?”.
hehe. sometimes i like to challenge people. actually the sound theological answer to that question is difficult.
are we talking about marriage as God defines it.. in which case, the act of sex [consumation] and then the taking on board of the wife, to the husband, the intention to care for and provide for her.. was the marriage act. …
or are we talking about marriage as the state defines it.. in which case, the same goes as above… a defacto relationship where there is a longterm commitment and the partners live together in the same manner a husband and wife do is recognised as being a legitimate ‘civil union’.
however.. scripture also tells us that we must live by the laws of the state. however there is no law that says we have to be married.. so where does that leave us?
taking scripture as a whole, we understand that the marriage bed is to be kept pure and undefiled [hebrews 13], that sex is to be kept within marriage. there is lots of talk about adultery etc. but nowhere does it specifically say ‘no sex before marriage’. that’s essentially because biblically speaking, sex is marriage. sex and the followthrough.
so where does that leave us… we have a ceremony because that acknowledges that we are communal people, that we live in community and a ceremony allows for the community that we inhabit to recognise and acknowledge the union.
so the answer is still the same as it would have been for most people reading this post from a Christian perspective. but we can back it up better now. of course my lecturer was interesting yesterday. he said ‘of course, sometimes it’s better to jsut give a young person a black and white answer’ … so, for all you young people.. HELL NO> but…
think not how wrong sex outside marriage is…
but rather.. how sex is that consumation act of marriage, marriage that is recognised and celebrated as part of a wider community, that although designed to reflect a unique part of our humanity, our desire for intimacy and commitment, also mirrors the relationship of Christ to the church… and sex within that premise is marvellous, wicked, delightful and much much better than just OK.
but imagine what would happen if the state no longer recognised Christian wedding ceremonies as legal ‘state-recognised’ marriages? would christians feel that the Christian ceremony was enough? or would we go through the civil process also, so as to be recognised as ‘married’ in every possible contortion? crazy talk this Theologising.
many thanks to Jordan Cooper who linked me via Steve Taylor. Jordan has some good stuff on his site, including these culture and postmodern resources. it’s nice to be floating around the world. if by chance you happen to have found your way here via someone else… do sahre who you are and where you came from.. let’s extend our community.
Speaking Of Community
perhaps it is true… that i want to be an American deep down. but somehow i think that i would rather be a visitor than a citizen. however… there are some thoroughly delicious things about america… namely this amazing girl danielle, not to mention [which is a completely redundant phrase because i am about to mention] manda and a few other spunky noodles.. like the ‘mystery artist’ on dani’s blog. first track of the soundtrack. listen and fall in love… if it wasn’t so entirely wrong and illegal… i would so beg her to send it to me on CD.